I got up extra early this morning. I wanted to get out of my house earlier so I could beat the morning traffic to get into Kingston.
My dog, Jackie looked at me quizzically as I opened the front door to leave. He was perhaps wondering where Mommy was heading to that early.
I greeted my neighbours as I walked towards the car. They seemed to also have the same idea as they were just about ready to drive out as well.
It took me a few minutes to get to the toll booth that would take me to Mandela Highway. I was pleased when I got there and saw only a few cars.
I glanced outside my window as I got on the highway, it was a beautiful day. To my right I could see the sun forcing its way through the blanket of clouds. It was time for it to arouse from sleep.
In that moment I thought of God’s love. I usually think a lot when I drive.
‘Do you still love me?’ I asked, as I gazed at the golden light piercing through the clouds. I knew the sun wasn’t God and that He was very much in the car as in the sky but the light was so great to look at.
I also knew better than to ask such a question but in the midst of deep thoughts about Church and Home and life and different areas where I thought I may have gone wrong I asked.
“…Send me a reminder today,” I requested.
I took a deep breath and regained my focus on the road ahead of me.
A few minutes later I heard something on the radio. I had my radio on a gospel radio station that I discovered recently but the programmes and music were drowned by my thoughts. In that moment I felt drawn to listen actively and that is when I heard, “How many times must I prove how much I love you”
A song was beginning.
I turned up the volume and smiled. It was almost unbelievable. It would have been easy to chalk it up to mere coincidence but it was too valuable and way too timely.
The words of the song continued:
“How many ways must my love for you I show
How many times must I rescue you from trouble
For you to know just how much I love you”
I listened and held back tears, intermittently whispering hallelujah.
Hallelujah was my way of agreeing with the questions being asked:
Didn’t I wake you up this morning (Yes)
Were you clothed in your right mind (Yes)
When you walked on this problem
Didn’t I step right in on time (Yes)
When you got weak along life’s journey
My angel carried you (Yes)
So you would know just how much I love you (Hallelujah)
How many days must I be fence all around you
How many nights must I wipe your tears away
How many storms must I bring you safely through
For you to know just how much I love you (Hallelujah)
Often times we lose sight of this love or our confidence wanes a little. Perhaps you are asking the same question right now as I asked this morning, ‘God, don’t you love me? Don’t you see me?’
Be reminded that He does. His love has not run out. He is still right there. He sees you and He knows you. He continues to protect you and He is still making provision.
Sometimes we just need a little reminder, a little jolt in our spirit to reaffirm that which we already know – that God love us.
Song reference: ‘So you would know’ by Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir